Personal Writing

Awareness

As I sat under the oak tree I realized that all of life was in me and I was in all of life. I and everything around me represented the whole of existence. It was subtly resting, nestling and nudging all throughout this world, as a way of letting itself out. The subtly in its expression was simple, pure and gentle like the eternal emotions of joy, happiness and peace. All you had to do was feel its vibration in your being to understand how everything in this life comes to a complete circle. How everything is oneness and a representation of the god-conscious energy that is the heartbeat of all of life, the frequency at which your heartbeat matches the consciousness of your knowingness of love. Its a forever presence that indicates your ability to recognize the love in your heart, in others and in the world. As you become aware of this energy you begin to be more accepting of yourself and of everyone  that you encounter. These encounters are a holy communion as two god present souls come into contact and oneness because of the love present in their being. This way of living and ascending in life is the path to self-actualization and self-knowledge.

Find your way back to your self

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We’ve all been there, that place where we lose sight of our self and who we are. How do we find our way back to our self? How do we open our hearts to courage so that we can take that step towards being with our self? We must begin, no matter how painful, no matter how low, no matter how frustrated, no matter how irritated and no matter how upset we are. We have to believe that even in the darkness there is a light shining. This light is not on the outside, but on the inside. Inside of you, where it remains lit, untamed and unshaken by any winds from the outside. Why? Because the outside circumstances, situations, emotions, thoughts or feeling have no affect on it. The only affect on it is the effect of eternal love; which is its fuel. This is the reason why this light burns in the first place. To realize this knowing is the initial step in allowing yourself to come back to  your self. When you grasp on to the stillness presented in this presence, you can use it as a rope to pull yourself out of wherever it is that you’ve gotten yourself lost into. Take a step towards accepting that where you are right now is okay, but its not where you belong. You belong in the open loving arms of your self, with the one that accepts you and loves you unconditionally. The conditions in which you are right now, are not conditions of your self. They are imaginary puppets of your dualistic mind, whose only requirement is that you obey it, honor it and listen to it. What if you didn’t do that? What if you chose not to listen? What if you decided to break the chains with which it has tied you down? Instead, what if you chose to honor Creation, of whose masterpiece you are? And what if you lovingly chose to honor your true self? You are not separate from your self, your mind creates the separation in order to satisfy its desire to always be in charge. Always be in control. Always be in the limelight. Your self doesn’t need this limelight, because its light is not one to be reckoned with or even one of comparison to the mind. It burns confidently in its knowing of who it is and who it has come here to be. Sit with this conscious knowing, thank it and allow it to embrace you and allow it to guide you back home, back to your self.

Give a Free Hug!

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This past weekend I had an amazing opportunity to do something completely out of my comfort zone, give free hugs to random people in the heart of the Magnificent Mile on Michigan Avenue. A friend of mine turned me on to the idea; although, hesitant at first I accept. I accepted because I want to say yes to growth and no to safety or ‘the safe zone’.We always have a choice between safety and growth. Self-actualization is the process of making every decision into a chance for growth. When we choose safety, its often done out of fear causing us to regress. Choosing growth allows for us to welcome new experiences into our life. At any given opportunity, choose growth and fearlessness so your authentic self can be expressed. That is exactly what happened to me. At first I was shy, awkward and even thought to myself: what the heck did I get myself into. However after the first hug, I felt a shift in my energy. I let go of any inhibitions, any judgement and welcomed compassion and love to be the channel through which I take on this opportunity to connect with complete strangers on a heart to heart; soul to soul level. I began to see people past their form identifiable bodies and really see them for that beautiful glowing light of abundant energy within. Only when you can allow space into your heart to see others for who they are, can you really begin to understand that all people really want is to be loved and feel connected. It was the most exhilarating, uplifting and heart opening experience I’ve ever had. If you are in the Chicago area and would like join in on the next Free Hugs event email me and I will send you the link!

Lift yourself by lifting others; then you will realize the true joy in being alive!

Watch the video I made, here.

The Tea Cup

A tea cup rested on the table right across from me as I gazed my eyes all around its composition. It was slender at the bottom, fuller at the top. It was all white with a blue sketching of a hummingbird which sat right at its rim, as if it were looking into the hallow cup. It had a softness and gentleness about it as it sat there on top of the saucer. Its handle reminded me of long slender fingers of a girl whose nails were always painted red. The tea cup seemed so lady-like and proper, it was a perfect companion to delicate caring hands that would handle it with care as it held a fragrant floral green tea for sipping and tasting.

Sacred Contract

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Cleverly she said she would do all that she could to keep that spark, that fire alive. She had made a commitment with all that scared her, all that challenged her and all that would change her life forever. She embraced the unknown with open arms and an open heart; ready to discover, ready to explore and ready to adventure. Into the hallows and depths of eternity from where she was from, yet never been.

Backstage

What do you do when you feel lost, confused, fed up and overall just really in a fog? That is exactly how I feel right now, and I can’t precisely pinpoint why. It sort of snuck up on me all of the sudden, it didn’t even give me a warning! All my emotions are a jumbled mess in my head. If there was a weather forecast for my head it would say this, “50 degrees with winds at 25 mph and 90% chance of flooding.”

Why do I feel this way? Well, I know that I am in a cycle of self destruction and self loathing right now. As to why I fall into these cycles of cynical disposition with my self, I have no clue. Perhaps a sense of unfulfillment, boredom, lack of joy, lack of self expression, but I think most of all the lack of self worth. I feel like I am doing absolutely nothing with my life, and the reality of the matter is that I am not. I am a lazy bum who loves to sit around all day and just wait…wait for what? I have no clue. Wait for the day that dollar bills pour out of the sky so then I can go on epic adventures around the globe, visiting and escaping from this treacherous world of insanity. But I can’t do that, and I won’t do that. Whats the point in running away, escaping and avoiding? This too is a part of the beautiful journey of life, and it too must be experienced. Because within these sappy, sad experiences lie crucial information about who you are. When you can stop trying to resist this state you can try to understand it and eventually the gift in it. Challenges always come bearing gifts. Every time you have a challenge remember there is also a gift involved, so keep your chin up and let them come. You’ve got this, you can handle anything, because nothing is greater than you. You are indestructible and you cannot be demolished. So stay with it, it too shall pass. Trust. No more comparison to what others are doing, or how amazing and wonderful their accomplishments are. So what if they are doing great things on stage, but do you know what’s going on backstage? You are taking care of the backstage stuff, so the show can shine on the front and center stage. You are taking the time to really understand, embrace and get to know the material so even if the there is glitch during the show.  You will remain calm, but most of all you will be able to stay with your peace and joy. There is no rush or something to have…it happens when it will, your only requirement is that you show up for yourself daily and choose to live this joyride called life. Live it fearlessly, live it with passion and most of all live it with authenticity!

If you can relate, tweet me @dearkajal. Share your input and spread the awareness!

What is, shall be. What is not, shall not be

It was one of those days when you could feel the silence that lingered within the room as though it had crept into your being and quieted everything down. A serene sense of peace smothered you as the silence settled in. You didn’t resist it. You didn’t even try to stop it, but rather you just welcomed it in. Closely with it you sat, as if you were holding its hand tightly and could feel the warmth entangled between both of your fingers. There was never an ounce of doubt in your mind that it would let go of your hand to make its way out, because with its invitation came a knowingness of “What is, shall be. What is not, shall not be”. That was your way of allowing the presence of peace to come forth and take you into its embrace. Together all three of you sat, hand in hand, heart in heart, blissfully cohabiting the same space, but in three very different ways. It was what was felt that really mattered, not what was seen or heard. For just being seen and heard meant something different than feeling. Feeling was the language of lovers, for it was the only thing that has the ability to dissolve, tear apart and remove walls or even mountains. It didn’t need a reason or perfect timing, it came either invited or as a guest. Because of its utter belief in all things unique, beautiful and true. It entered as a gentle glow of a candlelight in a dark room to ignite and lighten the darkness that somberly rested all around it. That was enough for it. It didn’t want anything more or desired anything different, for its only real task was one of light, truth and love. To open all hearts to such a thing because its heart wasn’t any different than anyone else’s, it knew that. And it was sharing with others its knowing. It was sharing its glow and igniting the unlit torches of the soul into magical flames of energy and absolute truth of being, the divine infinity of its own creation.

{KP 11.18.13}

Something Untitled

Being has nothing to do with definition.
Its an essence of an aroma that lingers with every breathe you take.
Being is to the level of awaken and aliveness you present in each moment.
A knowing that you are as you are: complete, whole and perfect,
Without any labels, nouns or titles attached.
You are the barebones of a great work of art, a masterpiece.

Her Knowing, Her Truth

For she sat between what was real and what was not. She didn’t really ever think to consider anything else other than the pure state of bliss and joy she felt deeply engraved onto her being. At times she would be reminded that this outer world is just a mere reflection of a bunch of thoughts, ideas, perceptions and attitudes. She didn’t think it necessary to adopt any such meanings to her viewpoint because her view was undefinable yet unexplainable. It was just the silent calm of knowing and the strong powerful arms of truth, who were her guide in this realm of illusion and suffering. They loved her deeply and stood by her as a light thin layer of glowing fog, which she didn’t know of because she could only feel them as a gentle little ladybug sitting on her palm. It was all she ever needed and all they ever wanted, was to see her beautiful mesmerizing smile that she wore proudly day in and day out, because she had an inner knowing and indestructible truth that she is and would be alright.

The Encounter

A sense of calmness filled my mind
A sense of certainty loomed over my head.
In that moment, I knew that I had tapped into something far greater than I could ever imagine.
It represented a part of me that I had neglected, ignored, abandoned and even killed.
I saw it standing there, right in front of my own eyes and then some how it collided into me.
As if I had merged into it and it had melted into every inch of my being.
Never have I felt the same, it changed me, it took me out of my own head.
It took me to another world, that was the most familiar place I’d ever been to, but at the same time I’d never gone.
I couldn’t understand what was happening, or why it was happening. It just happened and I was along for the ride, witnessing every single breathe I took as it made its way deep into my lungs, nestling right in.
It felt like I was breathing in magic, fairy dust that ignited all my senses into a deep communion that was held together tighter than any knot I could possibly tie. With each breathe, I felt reawakened, re-assured that I was alright, I need not worry or fret. I simply must feel the feeling and drift away into the unknown of the most truthful thing I had ever encountered. That sense of stillness and calmness still lurks within me, even after I’ve awoken back to this delusional realm of reality, called ‘truth’. I carry, the aroma of its love with me as I continue on my adventures, and dive into the blue daily to uncover, discover and recover more of who I am.